Anyway, today is my birthday but that definitely is not the important issue these days and who wants to get older anyway. We had another doctor come in today for a second opinion on my wife's neurological status. He stated that it is way too soon to tell anything but that there is definitely hope. He said that it would take 4 - 6 weeks to see if there will be any neurological or physical improvement. At any rate, my wife is getting more alert, looks better, reacts better to us and can't keep her eyes off the TV, only when the commercials are on (just like home). She definitely knows who we are and is trying to move her mouth more and more. Physical therapy was also in today to work with her and they stressed the importance of us massaging her right side to make sure that although she can't feel it, she realizes that it is still there.
JUNE 26, 2001
So far, there really hasn't been any change in my wife's paralysis but I have noticed she is more aware and I know she understands everything we tell her; she just can't communicate back with us. She does try to move her mouth to talk, but because of the stroke, it will not cooperate right now but I am optimistic that with rehab, things may change. The doctors are talking about a long term facility because there is no reason for her to be in an SICU any longer. Her infections are manageable (but still there) and at this point, she needs aggressive rehab to get her off the ventilator. This is the battle. On a good note, the vent is only doing half the breathing, she is doing the rest on her own. This in itself is a great accomplishment.
JULY 10, 2001
Well, I think things are looking up. There is no change in the paralysis, although the doctor did tell me he saw her move her foot, and she looks at us strange, like she feels something when we touch her right side. I know she is very withdrawn and depressed, which just kills me! At least she can show us emotion, and can feel emotion. I don't think I would have been as strong as her. Over the next week, she will be going to a rehabilitation facility where she will be aggressively weaned off the ventilator. She has been doing great over the last 5 days with her breathing. I went to visit this facility and it was beautiful I know that once she off of the ventilator, things will only get better.
JULY 17, 2001
My wife was moved yesterday to a rehabilitation facility not far from the hospital. I wanted her close should something happen. The move went very well, she wasn't upset. The facility was ready for her when we got there. They immediately cleaned her up. Later in the afternoon, she seemed very depressed and upset. She let me know that she was very sad and I told her that she had a very big accomplishment today; SHE LEFT THE HOSPITAL AND IS ONE STEP CLOSER TO COMING HOME!. On a good note, she started to try and talk again and although her mouth is not normal yet from the stroke, I was able to understand what she was trying to say. Occupational and Physical therapy were in already to access her and they have determined a plan that they will use. Also, her new bed came today, which is able to conform to a sitting position, which will be great for her. Starting tomorrow, she will be aggressively weaned off of the ventilator. The doctor said that her vent settings are not high at all and hopefully she will be off the vent within 3 weeks.
JULY 22, 2001
Well, my wife is pretty settled in the Nursing facility. I think a change of environment was good for her. The first time they did dialysis, there was a problem and they thought that she would have to be moved back to the hospital to receive dialysis as her port was clogged. The facility was in constant touch with the doctors and they finally got it unclogged. Yesterday was a rough day. She was upset and uncomfortable all day. I guess everyone has a bad day. On a good note, today she was great, had visitors and was very alert. She is trying to talk more which is good. Also, she is able to move the muscle in the top of the right arm which is great as this is her paralyzed side. I was nervous about her being moved as I was used to her having care around the clock, with someone sitting outside her room all of the time. Here in the new facility, it is not like that. She has no monitors for heart, oxygen, or blood pressure. The nurses are very attentive to her and I feel the care that she is receiving is just as good as in the hospital. I also let them know that I am not working now and will be there all day, every day. LOL LOL. Another nice thing is that she is able to have flowers now in the room. I am trying to make it a home-like setting for her. I brought her 2 dozen roses (she loves roses) and will make sure she has fresh flowers every week.
JULY 29, 2001
This week started out pretty good but I am sad to say that it is not important now. On Saturday evening, my wife was rushed to the hospital due to various complications. Her oxygen levels dropped, blood pressure dropped, and she was in septic shock. My friend was with me the whole day and we kept reassuring her that we were with her and that she was not alone. When we got to the ER, she was put in a room and she went into cardiac arrest twice but pulled through. Unfortunately, she did suffer brain damage and the doctor told us that she would not make it through another ordeal, which they knew would happen.
They moved her to the ICU and cleaned her. My friend and I went into the room and my wife looked so peaceful; clean sheets, gown, etc... I put her rosary beads in her hand, which she always liked. The nurse told us that it would not be long. I always thought I would be afraid when this day came but I wasn't. The nurse who was with us was wonderful! My wife loved the color purple and a funny thing is my friend who was with me was wearing purple and so was the nurse. The nurse stayed in the room with us the whole time, was so kind and compassionate. I showed her our wedding picture as I wanted her to see what my wife looked like before suffering all of this neglect. The nurse told my friend that in her years of nursing, she never saw decubitis ulcers like this before and never saw them on calves. She was appalled.
Shortly before midnight, my wife passed away. She went very peacefully and was not in pain. We stayed for a while to say goodbye and she just looked like she was sleeping. I am so glad I was there with her at the end. She fought a long hard fight, but just could not do it any longer. I said goodbye to her and told her it was ok to go. I told her to follow the light.
"When she saw the light, she followed it. She saw all of her family and friends that loved her, who passed on before her. When she crossed over, she wasn't in pain, she looked beautiful as she did before her illness, and she was again happy. Someday, we will be together again"
I would like to take this opportunity to say thank you to all of you who have been following my site. I hope my story has helped you with your research so you can avoid going through what we have gone through.
Although this journey has ended, my new crusade to educate and advocate has begun. I now have a new purpose in my life and hope all of you will be part of it.
Shortly, I will be adding new pages to this site. I will keep you posted.
THE END
PLEASE GO TO "A HUSBAND'S SUPPORT" TAB AT THE LEFT
